Who do you think you are? What do you want? Why do you keep looking at me? Ha? What’s your problem? Ha?
I can see you. I’m looking ‘cause I can see you.
So? You haven’t looked for so long? Look away. Why would you look now? What’s so special about me now? Don’t you have anything else to do? Ha?
I can see you now. I can physically feel you now. I am feeling your pain. It’s deep and intense and every time you say something with a lot of “negative” energy to me, I can feel it hurting physically, I can’t breathe properly anymore. Everything constricts and I feel I’m being sucked into a hole.
What do you want me to do about it? You’ve shut me here just like the other ones. I’m pushed away because I am too much, I am too much “me”, too much “I”. I just want to be left to be.
Are you still there?
Can I ask you something?
What happened that you feel so much pain and so hurt?
Nobody understood me, nobody understands me still. They’ve all got their heads up their asses and cannot see another human being hurting.
I must admit. I do myself feel like shunning you away still. Yet now I can see you. You feel very angry and annoyed and furious and who, in their right mind, would want that kind of energy around? If you were me, would you want your full of emotions barrel about to explode around?
No, you idiot. You can be here with me while I experience all that barrel little by little.
Well sure. I am up for that. Are you? Is all that rough and full blown into proportions teenager up for actually being present here and not just shutting everyone out and pretending you can do it all by yourself and you don’t need anyone? Cause that is what you are doing. Even now, with you back at me only seeing your face for a split of second when your mouth starts slurring anger towards me.
Well yeah! But you need to be here! You can’t keep going away when it is hard. For crying out loud, just help me be with these storms until they are rain with which I can be myself.
Ok. Let’s do that.
Ok. Jeez. Took you a while. Everything else was much more important, huh?
Or probably I didn’t see you. I chose not to see you ‘cause I couldn’t be with you. You were too much. Now I have space. I am a bigger space. Is that it? Can we freakin’ connect and just release all that is stuck here? I’m a bit angry as well now. Want to do this or what?
Yes. Jeez. Yes. Let’s do this.
Great. Two feeling anger start a relationship. Let’s see where this goes.